ASK ABDI: HOW TO SUSTAIN IMPROVEMENT?

QUESTION: My whole life there has been this barrier where I can not go past a certain point in improving my life, once I reach a level of improvement, everything just crumbles. I have always known that there was something at work.

I decided to try different things to mitigate it, until I discovered crystals. They have had a profound effect on me, especially right before I am about to fall asleep. I can feel the energy leaving my body in a way as if someone turned a fan on, and the vibrations to the extent that I feel the bed shaking. I am relatively new to this experience, and I wanted to ask you if you can shed some light as to why they would have such an effect, and if it is safe for my children to be in the same room when this happens? Any advice you can provide to me would be much appreciated.

ANSWER: Your description of “this barrier where I can not go past a certain point in improving my life, once I reach a level of improvement, everything just crumbles” is common to most of us. It is our unconscious at work pointing to our tolerance level of life force, and it can manifest in a myriad of ways. We make a conscious decision about an issue and exert our willpower to execute it. It all seems to go well until we get sideswiped with a seemingly hidden force, over which we are powerless. This is not bad luck or black magic, but mostly our unconscious inability to move beyond a certain level connected to early childhood issues. Deep therapeutic work is crucial here, as willpower alone can not penetrate this wounding. It takes hard, hard work, but it can be overcome. As counterintuitive as it might seem, we are unconsciously terrified/unable to hold life force in certain areas of our life, regardless of how badly we might want to. Light has to be shone into these areas, and the issues healed and integrated in order to see results in our daily life.

Let’s look at some common ways that such deep and old wounding can manifest in our lives. One can clean up one’s diet, fast or eat clean, and then out of nowhere go on a binge of toxic foods without control. For another, it can be a financial issue where they make a conscious attempt to put aside a sum of money. They earn and save a certain amount methodically, followed by impulsive spending that dwindles their savings. Or one works hard at becoming physically fit and reaches a certain level, only to injure oneself as soon as one gets into a groove. All of these situations can be repeated methodically in our lives until we approach it from a different perspective. White-knuckling it with willpower will not suffice. This is the eternal battle between our conscious mind and our unconscious, which runs our lives much more than we realize.

Now on to the crystals: think of them as concentrated masses of energy. As you are experiencing, their effect is real and can be powerful depending on one’s sensitivity and the crystals used. So educate yourself to their effect, as you become familiar with them. As with any other substance, I have seen them have no effect on certain people, powerful effects on others, and “negative” effects on some. The negative reactions have been too intense an emotional release from the use of too strong/too many crystals placed on the body for too long a time. As with all other energy therapies, the body self-regulates with time. But it is possible to release too many emotions, such as grief or anxiety, too intensely at one time.

Now to your experience of “energy leaving my body in a way as if someone turned a fan on, and the vibrations to the extent that I feel the bed shaking” as you fall asleep. This is a normal process that happens for all of us, but is out of our conscious radar. The bed is not actually shaking, although it feels like that. You are tuning into your energetic body as opposed to your dense physical meat suit we think of as ourselves. The crystals are not making this happen, they are heightening your sensitivity and you are staying conscious to this phase of falling asleep. It can be a frightening experience until one adapts to it. It is described as “body asleep, mind awake”. If you are interested in this topic, read Robert Monroe’s Journeys Out Of The Body.

Since this is a normal process, there is no danger to your children. The energy of a child is more sensitive than an adult, so be aware that crystals do affect their energy more than ours. That would be the one thing to be conscious of in this situation. Unless you are using crystals the size of boulders, this should not be an issue.

Happy journeying. The world you are stepping into is interesting and fascinating and much can be learned there. Do not, however, confuse it as being more important or special than your everyday life. It is just another channel on the dial. Your true nature is beyond that realm as well as this realm.